“Pain seems an insufficient reason not to embrace life. Being dead is quite painless. Pain like time is going to come on regardless. Question is, what glorious moments can you win from life in addition to the pain?” – Lois McMaster Bujold
A Conversation with Polly Humphreys, Personal Growth & Development Coach & Certified Consulting Hypnotherapist.
Last week, Dusty Staub, best selling author of The 7 Acts of Courage, spoke with Polly about what it means to follow your heart while putting your hands to work to change your life.
This is their conversation…
Who are you and what has been your life’s work to date?
Polly: It starts with the idea of Whose I am; as a worthy child of God. As a young child, if I had known that, it would have prevented immense fears that followed and haunted me into adulthood. Fears were needlessly all in my mind. My professional career includes an unseen Act of Courage: being a voice for others, for those who are not able to speak for themselves for some reason.
I have seen that there are many who are much like I was at one time. Their fears overcome them. These are people who are bullied, beaten, victimized or marginalized. My work can take the form of a prison ministry as well as that of a life coach for an executive. I work as a trusted, Certified Consulting Hypnotherapist and Personal Growth / Development Coach at Alternative Wellness and Beyond.
What I do is in the act of service to something greater, to creating something better, helping people realize their dreams. I help dedicated individuals to effectively change their lives and achieve their life goals. This is a fun, guided and highly interactive process.
The prison ministry came to be through my Church. I was looking to use my innate strengths and the pastor was talking about the prison ministry. My work there includes writing letters and showing up as a servant to the “lost” and those imprisoned. I visit the female inmates and I help to remind them both who they are as well as Whose they are. They need help finding the Courage to Dream, to understand something better in their future. I listen to their fears and make use of the Bible to outline key strategies to help them. This helps to remind them who they are, what is possible and what they can do.
What role has courage played in your life?
Polly: This goes back to when I was a young adult. I realized my fears would not go away until I faced them and addressed them. God led me to a good hypnotherapist and great life coach. It took the courage to realize I was stuck in a negative, repetitive pattern that was not helpful. It was a mental trap of negative self-talk and fear.
I came to realize that I would be OK with professional help if I would be accountable for my own thoughts and actions; and if I trusted the process of growth and positive change. It was so incredibly life changing that, inspired, I went on to advanced training so I could be a change agent and help to make a difference in the lives of others.
In doing this, there were four Acts of Courage that really made the difference: the Courage to Dream of a better way of living, the Courage to Confront my issues, the Courage to be Vulnerable and open; and finally, the Courage to Let Go of the old, what no longer served the identity that did not fit.
As an adult, in my profession, I have had to handle professional bullying. It took prayer and then the Courage to Confront and take action by engaging my supervisor with an action plan. Changes took place. Then the bullying restarted, and I had to step into the courage and patience to address it one more time. It was finally resolved in a good way. This took faith and courage, believing that I had a voice and right to be heard; and that it could turn out well.
Where do you see your clients most need courage?
Polly: I would say the Courage to Dream, to believe that the impossible is possible — then the Courage to Act while showing them how to take positive steps. This is very hard due to the societal lies that are told to people and the brainwashing many buy into and which limit them. Then there is the issue that many lack thought-stoppage strategies and skills to redirect the mind.
The speech center can send so many negative messages to the body and the body reacts accordingly. Having the tools to use ‘on demand’ (when needed), just as an athlete does, is crucial! People need to dream, to have development strategies and skills and then know when, and how to act; and when to rest, and when to let go.
What is the Best Advice You Can Offer?
Polly: I think, from a professional viewpoint, I can suggest the following:
- Once your mindset changes and you shift or let go of limiting beliefs, then everything on the outside will change with it if you are willing to make it so.
- The internal changes the external – we help to co-create our reality with the Creator.
- You cannot change anybody else, only yourself – the key is personal accountability.
- It takes the acceptance to know you are worthy, that you are not your past, that you are who you choose to be – to have the dream and then take the actions to create it.
- Support is huge. You need help and support, yet you have to take the actions yourself.
- The mind will lead your actions.
A Final Thought:
My website has a logo of a Heart held by hands. This is the key: at our best our hearts guide our heads and the hands then can take action to change our lives and our reality.
Find out more about Polly and her work on her website: alternativewellness.net